Skills in Emotional Intelligence

Developing successful Emotional Intelligence begins by understanding your emotions and their meanings. With this understanding, you must uncover productive ways to manage your emotions, then use them to the benefit yourself and others.

RelatedEmotional Intelligence Online Course

How to Accurately Perceive Emotions

The words that people say are only half of the message they are trying to get across. The tone in which they say it, or the emotion tied to their words, is the other half. For example, if your boss says, “We’re going to have to let you go” with the look of concern or in a caring tone of voice, he /she are actually saying, “Unfortunately, we are going to have to let you go.” On the other hand, if your boss makes that statement, trying hard to keep from laughing, he / she could be saying, “Fortunately, we are going to have to let you go.”

The ability to decide the manner, in which things are being said, lies in your knack of being able to decode the message by looking beyond the words themselves. It is important that you do not allow your emotional state of being to cloud your judgment of what is being said. Focus on the message (verbally and non-verbally) itself in order to accurately perceive the emotions of others.

Use Emotions to Facilitate Thinking

‘Use emotions to facilitate thinking’ is such a profound statement. How one feels will determine how he/she views situations. If you are in a happy mood, everyday events don’t seem so bad. On the contrary, if you are not in a happy mood, even the smallest of situations can seem major to you.

When it comes to the workplace, regardless of your mood, your boss expects you to be a high performer. Make it easy on yourself and ‘choose’ to be in a good mood.

Understand Emotional Meanings

The underlying reason for why you feel the way you do is very important to understand. If you know why you are unhappy, you can either alter the thing that is making you unhappy or consciously tell yourself that ‘thing’ is not worth allowing you to be upset, which can ultimately turn your negative mood into a positive one. Having this understanding can not only be used to internally gauge yourself, but can also help with how you interact with co-workers.

Manage Emotions

Knowing what emotion you are exhibiting or understanding the reason for that emotion is not enough to manage your emotions. Managing your emotions is a conscious and active task. This can be done in several ways. The overall goal is to establish strategies that utilize your emotions to help accomplish a goal rather than allowing your emotions to use you to create a futile outcome.

It is important to remember that your emotions are not the ‘enemy’. They contain valuable information that if used properly, can help you make sound decisions.